Joey Gannon Causes Car Wreck
Posted by Michael on 30 June 2004, 05:17 GMT

Yesterday a somber event struck the TI community, as one ticalc.org visitor has been critically injured in a tragic car accident. Carey Gutmann was driving to a summer job interview and reading driving directions with Joey's Map2Go 68k utility (Map2Go converts Mapquest driving directions into 68k eBooks). Washington D.C. police say that at some point, Carey became distracted and lost control of his 1986 Yugo, skidding across four lanes before colliding with a potato chip truck. At last report, Carey was hospitalized and listed in critical condition. The driver of the truck was not injured.

Grant Wood, deputy sheriff, reported: "We believe at one point [Carey] pressed the wrong button and became enraptured with his TI-89 while attempting to view the directions."

Other drivers who witnessed the accident reported a series of loud sounds as hundreds of bags of individually packed, not-for-resale potato chips exploded in unison. "I thought terrorists were attacking us. I pulled off the road and put my head down under the steering wheel," exclaimed Joy Racine, a local businesswoman. When informed that the noise in question was actually the sound of a hydrogenated fast food staple, she said, "That's a shame. Potato chips are so American - they go with hamburgers and apple pie, you know? This Joey Gannon kid must be a terrorist for plotting this. America'll get him."

Attorney General John Ashcroft has not yet decided on whether the government will charge Joey on any of the charges under consideration, including aiding and abetting terrorist activities.

We wish the best of luck to Carey in his recovery. As for Joey, he should have included a disclaimer of liability with his software.

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